Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Day 61 - Hot "Shots": Part Deux



I've always been the type of person who is really grossed out by a few certain things.  Watching someone just poke and prod their eye always gets me.  Especially if there's a squishy sound accompanying the touching.  **shudder**  That's the exact reason I always have to look away at a certain part of 'Ace Ventura 2'.  If you've been reading along, then you already know my feelings towards mayo, mustard, and belly buttons so I won't repeat those.  The surprising thing is that with being a dad, you'd think I'd be grossed out on a daily basis.  Between the vomit, dirty diapers, and runny noses, I figured I'd pretty much seen the worst of it and to tell the truth, I didn't find it all that bad.  The truth is that I just hadn't had the perfect opportunity come along to be super grossed out by Ellie.  Now I have...



Today was Ellie's four-month checkup which would obviously be accompanies by more shots.  Last time I took her to the doctor, I had grossly misjudged her eating schedule and received plenty of crying from her as a result.  This time I wasn't taking any chances so actually made a plan.  I know, scary right?  With Ellie needing to arrive for her appointment by 10:45, I decided to set an alarm for myself at 9:50.  The reason being that I knew I needed to not waste any time in getting her fed and ready to go, but I wanted her to sleep as long as possible.  Luckily, Ellie began waking up on her own around then so the alarm wasn't even necessary.  I was able to get her fed, changed, and in the car seat by 10:30 so that we could leave with no problem.

Taking your baby to the doctor is so much easier when they're actually in a good mood.  I mean the baby, not the doctor.  Although, it probably would be rough if the doctor was in a bad mood.  While waiting for our appointment, Ellie was happily playing and cooing in her car seat.  Once they called us back, I stripped Ellie down to her diaper so that the nurses could take her measurements.  Once again, no issues.  Then, the doctor came in and this is where things got really gross for me.  As the doctor was checking Ellie over, he asked me to hold her legs down for him.  I willingly obliged and was then horrified to see him open up Ellie's little girl parts and begin cleaning off dead skin.  Just one of the more disgusting things I've ever had the misfortune of seeing and I actually had to turn away.  I couldn't turn off my ears though because I had the sounds of Ellie screaming while the doctor explained in stark detail exactly what he was doing and why.  Fortunately, he said that babies generally don't have to go through that again.  That's good because I don't want to see it happen ever again.  There are just some part of a daughter that a father really shouldn't be seeing.

Doctor, what are you doing?

Following that little escapade, shots were nothing at all.  Ellie took them like a champ barely even squeaking as the second needle went in.  Then we were done.  I redressed Ellie and took her home where she could nap in peace as the immunizations worked their way through her system.  The moral of the story being twofold.  Number one, just because you've taken your baby to the doctor before, don't automatically assume you know what to expect.  And number two, you're just never going to run out of things in life that gross you out and make you uncomfortable.  If you have, well then, you're probably dead.  #DaddyWrite


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