One question. It's really quite simple. A one word answer
will suffice. Do you believe in evil twins? Yes or no? Simply put, I don't
believe in evil twins despite the whole 'Star Trek' Evil Spock has a goatee
thing. The primary reason being that people really don't have goatees that are
styled that perfectly. Not to mention the idea of there being someone out there
looking exactly like me with only the propensity to do evil.
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| Spock! Now available in Original and Goatee. |
Just because I don't believe in evil twins doesn't mean that
I don't believe in doppelgangers. If you're not familiar with the concept of
doppelgangers, German folklore teaches us that a doppelganger is a look-alike
or double of a living person (I guess that I can thank my brother-in-law for
having German stuff on die brain after a weekend with him). I've seen
doppelgangers in play a couple of times so knew it was possible. Well, after
today, Ellie knows the existence of doppelgangers first hand.
First things first, the three of us just got back late last
night from a weekend trip to Illinois, riding with Bethany's sister and her
family to see her brother. Needless to say, Ellie was a little messed up from
her weekend away between long hours in the car, different eating hours,
different bedtimes, and sleeping in a new place. That is plain and evident from
her refusal to sleep in her crib last night, instead confiscating my bed and
exiling me to the twin bed in her room.
Of course, like the eternal optimist I claim to be, I chose
to believe that today would be a different story. Rainbows, sunshine, and
kittens for my sweet baby. Unfortunately that was not to be the case. Ellie
pretty much began the day in a foul mood as soon as her mommy left for the day.
No matter where attempted naps would occur, sleep did not follow. After almost
three hours of crying, I decided to not push the issue on a nap anymore and get
Ellie up.
After downing four ounces of milk, Ellie was a brand-new
baby showing off her mad crawling skills, playing plenty, and gracing me with
lots of laughs and smiles. Once 11:00 hit, Ellie started in with some massive
yawns and allowed me to put her down for a nap. Not long after that, my
parents, who were in town for an eye appointment, called to see if we would
like to join them for lunch. Like a smart dad, I gave a non-committal answer
saying that it would work if Ellie woke up in time.
Luckily for me, Ellie woke up about 10 minutes before we
would need to meet them and since she had been in a good mood, I decided it was
safe to go. I packed some lunch for Ellie as well as a multitude of toys and we
headed to Olive Garden for lunch.
One of Ellie's favorite things is to be out of the house and
she especially shows an affinity for restaurants. The girl absolutely loves
being around people and thinks it's a blast to just watch people in their
natural environment. Maybe she'll do something cool someday and go into some
kind of wildlife ecology like Jane Goodall. Or she'll just work at a restaurant
for minimum wage and tips. Time will tell.
After Ellie was held by my parents accordingly, I sat her in
her high chair and began to feed her some yogurt which was met by a variety of
sounds basically meaning "More." This would persist until the restaurant
began to fill up with the lunch crowd giving Ellie plenty of people to watch.
All was good until she glanced at a table approximately 12 feet away from us
only to see someone that looked kind of familiar to her. Brownish-blonde hair,
slim build, and tall. In the eyes of my daughter, she wholeheartedly believed
she had found her mommy. Unfortunately for me, she happened to be a
doppelmommy.
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As Ellie began screaming at the top of her little lungs for
the doppelmommy to pick her up, I excavated her from the high chair and carried
my screaming child to the lobby to calm her down. My mother followed shortly
thereafter to check on the two of us. At this point, Ellie had mostly calmed
and was even smiling a little again so I thought it safe to return to our
table.
I treated Ellie to some bites of breadstick upon our return
intermixed with bites of yogurt. All was well until Ellie heard a waiter delivering
salads to a nearby table. As Ellie glanced over, she was reminded of the
presence of the doppelmommy. Ellie would turn into a screaming, quaking mass at
the sight of the doppelmommy as I carried her out of the restaurant again.
Try as I might, I could not calm my daughter on this
occasion. I solemnly dialed my father's cell phone to ask him if one of them
could bring out Ellie's things as we needed to head home. My mom came shortly
with Ellie's effects as well as my meal-to-go. My mom poked her head inside the
car to bid adieu to her grandchild only to be met with epic screams that
basically meant, "Get out of my face." With that, we left Olive
Garden and headed home where Ellie was put down for another nap.
While the issue ended up resolved in the end, I now find
myself living in a mild state of fear. Am I going to need to worry about
doppelmommies wherever I travel from here on out? If so, I may never leave the
house again. At least not without my newly patented baby blinders. Maybe
that'll finally be the product that gets me on 'Shark Tank'. Right Cuban? #DaddyWrite
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| Dude, I'm trying to watch the Mavs here. Stop bugging me about being on 'Shark Tank!' |
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