Day 378 - The Good Old Days

Anyone else fondly remember those days of binge-watching through massive DVD sets in order to see your favorite show to completion? This is even more unlikely, but who remembers that time when the only way to see every episode of your favorite show was to watch it live? If you missed it, then you were likely out of luck. 

Yes, I do agree that was a terrible time for all mankind. Now, through the beauty of technology, I can watch as many episodes of 'The Office' in one sitting as my little brain can handle. In case you're wondering, the max for yours truly seems to be about three. More than that and I can literally feel my brain turning to mush.

I'm not to the series finale of 'The Office' yet (on this watch-through) but today I found myself thinking about a quote from a wise sage named Andy Bernard (aka Ed Helms) as seen in that episode. That quote reads as follows: "I wish there was a way to know you're in "the good old days", before you've actually left them." I know this is seemingly a random transition but hang in there and I promise to get to my point.

Flashback to about three weeks ago which coincidentally coincides with Bethany's and my decision to transform Ellie's crib to a toddler bed. As you may or may not remember, Ellie had begun to channel her inner Ninja Warrior and scale out of her crib on a normal basis, falling to the floor below.

While the actual deconstruction of the crib wasn't the hard part, the adjusting period for Miss Ellie was. In fact, it became a normal state of affairs for me to end up prone on a couch with my daughter fast asleep on my chest for hours (yes, hours). I can read your thoughts now. "Oh no, poor guy is stuck on a couch. His life must be so hard." And yes, that statement was pretty much dripping with sarcasm.

Truthfully, this was something that was getting to me as I pretty much felt zero sense of accomplishment in knowing that I spent about 1/4 of my "work day" trapped and unable to do anything. Fortunately, Ellie adjusted to her new bed within a week and a half thereby restoring my sense of accomplishment (or lack thereof) to my day.

At least that had been the case until today. After only napping in her crib for 40 minutes, Ellie awoke from her slumber to the accompaniment of dramatic screams. Like any good parent would, I bounded up the stairs to retrieve Ellie from her room before she hurt herself beating her head against the door. Now, obviously Ellie needed more sleep than 40 minutes so I retreated to the couch, laid Ellie on my chest, and lulled her back to sleep.

Here's where Mr. Bernard comes into play. As I laid there trapped by Ellie's 25-pound frame, I began to realize just how much I'd missed those times of her snuggling close even though it'd only been a little over a week. I also found myself wondering just how many of those naps together the two of us would have left.

"Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep, little baby."

Boy, was that a super sobering thought. All of this time, I had considered this arrangement to be a total inconvenience not realizing just how special of a time it was. My daughter, for as sweet as she can be, isn't really one to snuggle and here I had hours to just lay there with her sleeping peacefully in my arms.

Honestly, it made me wonder just how many other things I've been needlessly irritated about that I'll miss when it's gone. It also makes me less apt to wish away parts of the all-too-brief times that I will have with her. 

Now, I have something to ask of you, dear readers. Make sure you remind me of this post when I inevitably start complaining about some stage of Ellie's life and how I can't wait for it to end. Doesn't matter if it's napping on my chest, potty training, teaching her how to do math, or training her how to properly assemble and eat a soft shell taco. It's likely all will eventually be part of the good old days.

As I said, I only get 18 years with her under my roof. I need to make sure I'm enjoying all of it. Or, you know, at least 95% of it. #DaddyWrite

Day 375 - Who Owns What Again, Ellie?

As anyone who has lived with a roommate knows, you reach a point where quite a bit of your stuff becomes relatively co-mingled. In fact, by the time you and said roommate are ready to say sayonara to your living arrangement, your clothing is pretty much the only things that are guaranteed to belong to you. Although, if sitcoms have taught me anything, it's that female roommates tend to share everything, including clothing.

Male roommates only have to worry about who gets the canoe...

Now, once I got married, it goes without saying that everything that belongs to me belongs to my wife and vice-versa. Ok, I should definitely add that clothing is once again the exception to the rule. I can truthfully say I've never staked a claim to Bethany's clothing. Although, come to think of it, she has been known to pluck some of my t-shirts or hoodies from collection at times for her own personal use. Need evidence? Look no further than the series of belly photos from when Bethany was pregnant with Ellie.

Now, when I had a roomie and the time came to split stuff up, we always would have to strive to remember who the original owner was. That way we knew it was going home with the right person. Lucky for me, even though it’s unnecessary, Ellie has taken it upon herself to ascribe the ownership of particular items to Bethany or me.

I noticed this trend last week while Bethany was gone at work. Ellie would find something that she knew belonged to Bethany and bring it to me, proclaiming "Mom" over and over again. Popular items for her to do this with include Bethany's blanket, pajamas, and random clothes. However, the ownership declarations did not stop there as it even featured items such as Bethany's cereal bowls and cups.

Now, I'll admit that I was feeling a bit left out. It certainly seemed as if my daughter didn't care enough to attribute ownership of items to me. However, that seems to have changed with Ellie's new game of comparing and contrasting Mommy's stuff with Daddy's Stuff. For example, she's figured out that Bethany tends to eat cereal out of a plain white Corelle bowl whereas I use a larger, plastic bowl. She's also been wandering around the house for a couple of days carrying a water bottle I used on Saturday declaring it to be "Dad's". 

Perhaps my favorite part of this little game occurred today as I was getting Ellie ready for story time at the library. As I was getting her dressed, I laid out the outfit I had in mind. However, before I could start stripping off Ellie's pajamas, she caught sight of the pair of pants I had set aside, and was overcome with excitement, declaring them to be "Mom's". It should go without saying that my wife, small as she may be, does not wear a 24-month pant. However, to Ellie's untrained eye, the pants I had set out reminded her of Bethany's pajama pants. 

"Mom."

Now, I should mention that I abstained from dressing Ellie in her prized "Mom pants". I instead found another shirt and pant combo. The reason why? I was hoping to avoid a possible breakdown caused by Ellie spending the day #MissingMommy courtesy of a pair of pants. However, that doesn't mean we won't take advantage of this nice little coincidence at some point.

In fact, Bethany is already planning to dress Ellie in said pants on Saturday while wearing her "matching" pajama pants. Now, if I was asked how this will go, I'd be lying if I said I don't expect Ellie's little brain to explode due to pure happiness at looking just like her mommy. 

Now I have one final question for you? Do you think she'd also be excited if I got her an outfit that matched something I wear? Yeah, I don't think so either. #DaddyWrite

Day 371 - Proper Care of Inanimate Animals (Day 370, Part II)

I like Target quite a bit. Do you like Target? I'm going to bet you do. It's like a nicer, cleaner, smaller-scale Walmart. What's not to love?

Well, there is that whole pesky meme about Target that seems to be pretty accurate. You know, the one where you walk into Target for one item and inevitably end up spending $278.53. For the record, in my experience, it hasn't been anywhere near that much money spent. However, it does seem that I can't step foot in Target without spending more than I need to. 

Ok, so while I've established that I apparently now have a love-hate relationship with Target (or at least my wallet does), Ellie differs from her daddy in that regard. You see, Ellie has a love-LOVE relationship with Target and it's all due in part to one thing.  Or maybe I should say due in part to one fictional canine. 

Given how you're likely a smart, intelligent reader, you realize by now that I'm referring to Bullseye, Target's loveable mascot. It's not like he's roaming the aisles, ready to come and greet you at your beck and call, but there are signs and images of his visage all over the store. Need an example? Look no further than Bullseye's Playground, formerly known as the Dollar Spot, right as you enter the store.

Mostly an accurate representation of Bullseye's Playground at our local Target

In Ellie's eyes, Bullseye's Playground cannot be missed any time we visit the store. That probably has less to do with the actual items for sale and more to do with the cartoonish Bullseye mascots that are now a staple of the section. In fact, on our most recent visit, Ellie found herself completely overcome by her desire to touch his comically oversized snout. 

As always, I strapped Ellie into a shopping cart for our trek around the store. However, once she saw Bullseye, she began saying "dog" and straining against her restraints with all of her might. Side note, I'm really enjoying the phrasing of 'straining against her restraints.' Finally, I decided to give in and unstrap Ellie from the cart. Not only that, but I lifted Ellie up onto my shoulders, allowing her to rub Bullseye's nose as much as she wanted. 

C'mon Bullseye! You can ride in the cart with me.

Now, in hindsight, I probably should have realized it's not exactly normal to lift your daughter up to touch a marketing display of a dog in Target. In case I needed additional confirmation of that being the case, the stares and occasional laughs by other shoppers helped with that. Finally, I brought Ellie down from my shoulders (against her wishes) while gazing up at the streaks left on the dust-covered snout of Bullseye in her wake. At that point, all I could do was chuckle at how much poor Bullseye needed a good bath.

While I figured we were done with Bullseye for our trip, I was pretty much wrong about that as we encountered another Bullseye roughly three feet away from the original. At least Bullseye II's (as he will hence forth be referred to as) was unreachable for poor Ellie even if she would have been on my shoulders. Poor thing. All she could do was sadly wave at his wagging tail sticking out of a box as we walked by to complete our mission. 

You know, that and make her many objections known vocally to every other shopper in Target. #DaddyWrite

P.S. I just discovered during the editing and posting of this blog that Target apparently sells stuffed versions of Bullseye the Dog. I think I know what Ellie's getting for her birthday now.

Day 370 - Proper Preparation of Play-Doh Platters

I can only imagine what it's like to experience the world as a toddler does. I'm guessing that every single day seems brand new and overwhelming in a variety of ways. The sights, the smells, and the tastes probably all combine for a pretty epic experience. 

However, there are definitely downfalls to experiencing the world as a toddler does. Obviously, there's that whole lack of complete sentences thing. One also can't forget about the inability to use a toilet either. However, I would say chief among the downfalls would be something I like to refer as "not knowing what you don't know." 

Man, I thought maybe I had broke new ground with that "not knowing what you don't know" thing.

I know that in order to fully support my hypothesis, I need to be able to present legitimate evidence as to why I feel that way. Lucky for me, Ellie decided to provide me with an example that I feel more than support my theory.

First, we must flashback to this morning. Between the cold and the rain, it's obvious that playing outside wasn't really a possibility for today. However, that didn't mean Ellie and I had to remain cooped up in the house. Instead, we chose to head to the library this morning for Toddler Story Time at 9:30. 

It should be said that our experience was a little different than normal with only three other kids in Ellie's age range there. That meant that Ellie was much more comfortable than normal as she tends to be slightly spooked by large groups of people, especially when kids older than her are among them. 

While most of the activities were the same old thing, the closing activity changed things up a little by introducing a new concept to little Ellie: Play-Doh. I made sure to study my daughter's face intently as I opened up the jar to reveal the orange substance inside. Curiosity and confusion spread across her face as I slapped the Play-Doh down on the table and began rolling it flat. 

At this point, Ellie decided that maybe, just maybe, the Play-Doh wouldn't hurt her and therefore, it was safe to touch. Once her shaky finger finally made contact, she turned and stared at me to confirm that what she was doing was right. I smiled back at her to reassure her that it was indeed safe to play with. We then spent the next few minutes using the cookie cutters provided to make any number of shapes you can imagine.

Finally, as time went on, Ellie's curiosity began to take control. First, she grabbed hold of the ball of Play-Doh, lifting it towards her mouth to take a bite. The result, me intercepting the ball and returning it to the table where we continued to play. That didn't stop Ellie's curiosity though as she decided next to divide my attention in order to achieve her goal.

Ellie strategically (at least I like to think so) divided her Play-Doh into two piles, one near me and one on the other side of Ellie. As we played with the ball closest to me, I noticed Ellie continually eyeing the ball on the other side, just looking for an opening to sneak a taste. Finally, the moment arrived. Ellie had handed me the ball of Play-Doh and the container, essentially asking me to put it away. As I did so, she quickly lifted the ball to her mouth attempting a bite. Don't worry as I intercepted the ball again.

However, what I didn't know was that after our time playing with the Play-Doh, there were small remnants left on the table I hadn't been paying attention to. Unfortunately Ellie had been. Before I knew what was happening, Ellie swiped her hand across the table, grabbing a tiny piece of Play-Doh, and placing it directly in her mouth. I tried in vain to pry her mouth open and extricate the contents only to find that it was already gone down her esophagus. Lucky for us, Play-Doh is Non-Toxic and made of wheat byproducts according to the label. 

That being said, I still feel like it's a parenting fail on my part to let my daughter consume Play-Doh. However, based upon the reactions of other parents there, I just achieved a special milestone in parenting. Although, the more I think about it, it doesn't seem like one for the scrapbook. That's true, right? #DaddyWrite

Someone please confirm to me that this isn't Ellie's future now.