Day 188 - Positively Descending

Do you ever have one of those moments where you start to feel a little bad? Not sick or anything like that. Although, in case you didn't know, it is quite common for one to feel a little bad when they are sick. Consider that to be your two cents of wisdom for the day. Better yet, you got it for free! 

What I'm referring to is actually a story from my Life Group this past weekend. Someone talked about how they were making strides to find at least one thing to be thankful for every day. I found that convicting as it's super easy for my pessimistic/sarcastic side to keep me from being thankful. Therefore, I decided to set out on a mission to find at least one thing to be thankful for every day. I just didn't expect Ellie to make me work so hard for it.

I'm actually going to lead with a simple, undeniable fact. This fact is true no matter where you're at in life. Mondays are the worst. And by the worst, I mean the absolute worst. Now, as a stay-at-home dad, I'm not required to do the whole 9 to 5, get in a car and drive to the office, guard your eyes from the harsh office lights, and earn a paycheck kind of thing. However, I still do have a definitive end to my weekends. My weekend officially comes to an end each Monday morning around 7:00 am as I stand at the window, Ellie in my arms, waving goodbye to Bethany as she disappears down the road. I'm generally able to put Ellie down for her long morning nap shortly after Bethany leaves for work. That was not to be the case today. 

When I laid Ellie down in her crib and left the room, I did so without hearing a peep. In fact, I wouldn't hear a peep until 40 minutes later when I was treated to violent screams emanating from Ellie's room. As I bounded up the stairs to check on her, I was treated to an undeniably terrible smell before even opening the door. Knowing what awaited me, I opened the door and lifted my screaming baby out of her crib. I then went to the changing table, laid her down, and changed what may be the smelliest diaper of all time. After that, I made the attempt to put her down and left the room. Alas, Ellie returning to sleep was not to be. She would actually only sleep a total of one hour for the remainder of the day. A side-effect of Ellie's lack of adequate rest is that I would find myself treated to a endless array of screaming and whining as the day progressed. 

I have a dream. Someday I can tell Ellie to "Stop Screaming!" and low and behold, she'll actually stop screaming. I know that it's likely a pipe dream, but don't take away my hope. (Yay for the longest caption ever!)

Don't worry, I promised I would find a positive in my day and I hate to lie to lie to you, my readers. The lone positive in my day is that Ellie finally learned to go down the stairs on her own. Well, sort of on her own. Also, I know what you're thinking; "Didn't she already learn to fall down the stairs successfully?" Well, that is accurate, but this time she actually made it down them without falling. As I placed her on the top step, facing upwards, Ellie began to gradually shuffle backwards. Step-by-step, she would head down, gingerly sliding down the steps, one knee at a time. Before she knew it, she had reached the bottom. Then, she scampered back to the top to practice her new trick again and again.

Never call it a trick...

See, I did find something positive in a day of screaming and whining (which may or may not have come from both of us). The challenge is actually going to be me keeping this up. Especially when you consider Ellie's not going to descend stairs for the first time every day. Although to her, the next time will probably feel just like the first. Yay for still-developing memories! #DaddyWrite

Day 185 - Ellie Eats Nuggets

Ok, it's time for audience participation. I've been writing to y'all intermittently for somewhere in the neighborhood of 185 days. I say somewhere because I want to leave the possibility open of me screwing up on counting days at some point. If I wanted to ensure accuracy, then I probably should have been scratching tally marks into some tree a'la Tom Hanks in Cast Away. As I failed to accomplish that, then you just have to take me at my word when I tell you the number of days.

Congrats Tom. You've made it twelve days. Good for you!

Where was I? Oh yes, audience participation. Raise your hand if you like to eat out (side note, it'd warm my heart if someone, somewhere is actually raising their hand). I know that I always enjoy to eat out for several reasons. Among those reasons is the fact that there's no preparation, it's normally tasty (and likely bad for me), and I get out of the house for a while. 

Normally, I've been the only one getting to partake in the meals when we eat out. Ellie has been resigned to sitting and watching me eat while hoping I'll take pity and throw her a scrap. Well, that is the case no longer as today marked the first time I purchased food from a restaurant earmarked for Ellie and Ellie alone.

Per normal protocol, exposition first (I just really wanted to use 'exposition' instead of 'background'). Bethany has been a loyal user of the Chick-Fil-A Rewards App since they opened a location on Barry Road. She especially loved the freebies that came along with it. Now that her company has moved to Kansas, it's really not feasible for Bethany to eat out for lunch as often. That's especially true as most of her co-workers have short lunch breaks now. Therefore, I'm now the one to reap the benefits of the freebies. Muhaha!

With a free BBQ Chicken Sandwich to her name that expired on Friday, Bethany knew it was unlikely she would use it and gave me the green light to take advantage. So, once Ellie woke up from her mid-morning nap, we loaded up and headed to Chick-Fil-A to grab some lunch. Now obviously, I was already planning on my sandwich, as well as a Cherry Coke and some waffle fries. Per Bethany's suggestion, I decided to treat Ellie to her own order of chicken nuggets. 

After getting our meal, Ellie and I sat down at a table (with the assistance of Ellie's honorary "aunt", Tabi, who was working and spied us entering on the security camera). Now, if you know Ellie, you know that she is often transfixed by everything happening around her when in a public setting. Therefore, I really wondered just how successful I would be in my attempt to feed her something new. Especially with her history of refusing to eat new foods for me. To my surprise, Ellie was completely transfixed on the nuggets as soon as I removed them from the packaging and began slicing them up with a plastic knife. She even made desperate grasps at the tray to pull the food nearer to her. 

There is no significance to this gif outside of the nuggets. I just find it super confusing and therefore feel compelled to share.

Finally, I handed her the first tiny piece of nugget and watched to gauge her reaction. Ellie rolled the nugget around in her mouth to confirm that she did indeed want to try eating it. Then, after passing the first test, Ellie began chomping up and down ferociously before finally swallowing. She then turned back to me with her mouth wide open, excitedly demanding more. Before I knew it, Ellie had eaten four chicken nuggets, several of my fries, and part of my bun. This all in addition to the yogurt/applesauce concoction she consumed before leaving for the restaurant. 

Overall, I think I would call Ellie's first fast food order to be a success. We got to see both Tabi and Malachi by the time it was finished. I also got to eat food that is less than optimal for me. Better yet, I got to introduce precious Ellie to the wonders of processed food. What baby doesn't want to experience that? #DaddyWrite

Day 183 - When History Repeats Itself

As Ellie gets older, I find it super intriguing to watch her little personality continue to develop and flourish. For example, one of my favorite activities is trying to figure out which facets of her personality come from me and which ones come from her mom. For example, Ellie hates being stuck at home. If she could voice her own desires and opinions (you know, in a verbal manner), I'm positive she would ask to go outside to find some kind of adventure. It should be well-known by now that I go completely stir-crazy if I spend too much time at all. There are a ton of other personality traits that I can see Ellie developing but there is one in particular I've come to love. In fact, the trait in question comes directly from her mother first and foremost.

 

Here's the necessary background information. Ellie's evening activities are pretty well defined. Well, at least we believed they were. Once Bethany gets home from work around 5:00, she promptly nurses Ellie. Following that, we let the baby play until around 6:00 when we plop her down in the high chair for dinner. Once dinner is over (usually around 6:30), we draw Ellie a bath and give the water five minutes or so to cool down before placing her in the tub. After bath time is done, Ellie is supposed to go to bed. However, that has not been the case as of late.

Ellie's basically decided that only babies need sleep. Unfortunately, she does not view herself as a baby anymore. It's probably Bethany's and my fault as we've been praising her lately for being such a big girl. Therefore, little Ellie now wants to act older than she is. One of her ways to do so is via her refusal to sleep. Ellie will immediately stand in her crib after being put down and will either scream until someone comes to save her or until she passes out. It's just whichever comes first.

As Bethany and I don't really enjoy the eardrum shattering cries of our daughter, we pretty much always give in and bring Ellie to our TV room to play whilst we relax. And play she does. In fact, it's become common for Ellie to play so hard that she will actually drop her entire body to the ground from pure exhaustion. Following that, she'll fight back to her knees and begin crawling again only to experience the same fate moments later.

Kind of like that. Just without the walking part.

I think that I love watching this so much because it actively reminds me of the early years of our marriage. Bethany would often make the mistake of staying up too late and would find herself collapsing onto the floor while going to do the simplest task. Sometimes, all that stood between her and her bed was to brush her teeth. However, a short catnap would be the only thing that would give her the stamina to complete said task.

As Bethany and I are celebrating seven years of marriage on Monday, it's easy to find myself looking back at the past seven years and remembering some of the stories that brought me joy. Even though it doesn't happen nearly as often anymore, I will always remember the nightly ritual of trying to scoop my wife off of the floor so she could go to sleep. Luckily for me, it seems I'll get to relive that all over again with Ellie. 

At least I think it's lucky. Who knows? I may revaluate that statement if Ellie's still crumpling into a heap on the floor from exhaustion when she's a teenager. #DaddyWrite

Day 181 - Ellie's Eye Exam

In my (nearly) eleven months of parenting, I've learned it's quite normal to worry for your child. If Ellie happens to fall down, I want to see that she's ok (especially if it's down the stairs). Once I know she's fine, I tell her to suck it up and quit crying (Don't spell my name with an 'I' when nominating me for father of the year). Of course, we've had to go through the process of being worried about Ellie's weight and whether or not she's growing fast enough. For the record, she's growing so fast now that we're strug-gal-ling to keep her in clothing that fits. 

One part of being a parent who's concerned for your child's well-being is to schedule normal check-ups. Now, I've always known that doctor appointments are a constant thing for babies. I think that may be part of Parenting 101. However, until we had Ellie, I didn't know that people actually subjugated their infant children to eye exams. So with her eleven month birthday rapidly approaching, I decided that it was indeed time to subjugate Ellie to her first eye exam. That's especially true when you consider that infant eye exams are free for those under a year of age.

With Ellie around, I've discovered the importance of allotting adequate time for us to head anywhere since I need time to get her in and out of the car seat. Therefore, Ellie and I left home today at 2:05 to make the long, arduous, two-mile drive to the eye doctor's office for her 2:15 appointment. Once we arrived, I was greeted by a nice stack of paperwork to fill out. Luckily, Ellie was extremely happy to play in the children's area until I completed said paperwork (She only tried to escape once!). Shortly thereafter we were called back to an exam room.

I don't know what I expected when scheduling Ellie for an infant eye exam. I think I just thought the exam would be something like "Look at the pretty pen; follow the pretty pen from side-to-side and up and down". Imagine my surprise when a nurse comes in saying, "She's going to hate this part. Babies never like having their eyes dilated." So, there I sit in the big exam chair, tightly holding my daughter and expecting the worse. 

The nurse pulls out a tiny bottle with a long tube attached, not unlike a can of compressed air, and holds it up to Ellie's right eye. Pressing the nozzle, a thin stream of liquid comes out, pelting Ellie right in the eye. She jerks backwards, blinking multiple times but doesn't have any other reaction. The nurse then repeats the process on the left eye before adding, "I've never had a baby so good at getting their eyes dilated." I'm still actually trying to decide if I should be proud of Ellie for this achievement or if it just means she's weird. She's probably weird...

I think I could style my hair in those big black eyes!

After a short wait, the doctor entered the room to check Ellie's eyes. If you're wondering how an infant's eye exam is conducted, the eye doctor uses a variety of lights to track eye movement and muscle control. I was slightly worried about the outcome of these tests considering that I had a lazy eye as a kid. Also, it's possible that Bethany's contact lenses are part of the Hubble telescope. It turned out my worries were in vain as Ellie checked out perfectly for her age. Side note, it's intriguing to me that all babies should be farsighted at Ellie's age. 

It's nice to be able to chalk Ellie's first eye exam up as a success. I think I expected things to go pretty terrible, especially with less-than-optimal napping on her part today. There was really only one brief moment where I was concerned. Of course, that was because the eye doctor recognized me after not going to that office for two years. Nothing's worse than giving an eye doctor the old "It's not you, it's my insurance" speech. I'm just glad he didn't cry because if he cried, then I would have cried and then it just would have been a big, awkward situation for all of us. #DaddyWrite

Believe it or not, this photo was the doctor's idea...

Day 179 - Caution: Wet Floor

Like anyone who claims (possibly erroneously) to be a writer, it's totally normal to find oneself suffering from some form of writer's block. For me, it stems from one of two reasons. One possibility is that I literally have no ideas whatsoever.  A good analogy would be my head is an Easter Egg and the empty air inside is symbolic of my brain: not a single idea to be found. The other reason is that I have ideas but have no idea how to put them down on paper (or computer) in a legible or cohesive manner. I feel like I don't run into that issue when doing #DaddyWrite, but it does rear its ugly head in other creative endeavors.

Lucky for me, today is the exact opposite as I find myself with two ideas that I'd be excited to write about. Sometimes, I'm able to seamlessly tie two nonrelated topics together (debatable). Or, I attempt it and fail miserably (more likely). Other times, I don't do so because I don't want to subject my 21 faithful readers to the 800-plus words it would take me to tie the topics together. This is one of those times where I don't want to subject readers to 800-plus words. That, and well, I'm lazy. So, with great excitement and fanfare, I proudly present to you, ONE TOPIC! (Side note, if I ever start a band, One Topic will be the name so please don't steal it.)

Dibs on the cowbell...

It's a total given that one of Ellie's favorite times each day is bath time. She's such a fan that the very second she hears the faucet turn and the water pour out, she crawls at warp speed towards the stairs and flies up them in a flash. Before you know it, she's in the bathroom standing at the tub next to you and pushing each of her toys into the water, one at a time. Finally, she'll begin trying to hoist herself over the edge of the tub with all of her might. This pretty much continues until the second you pick her up and take her to her bedroom to undress her. 

Normally, bathtime doesn't change much from night-to-night. Undress the baby, run down the hall with the baby screaming "Naked Baby!", drop gently place the baby in the bath, bathe the baby, dry the baby, diaper the baby, clothe the baby, and finally put the baby to bed. Tonight was one of those nights that things didn't go according to plan.

I was in our basement at the time (wrapping up straps for our hammock if you care) so all of this information comes to you secondhand. Therefore, I cannot be held accountable for its accuracy. Ellie apparently took great joy in her nightly game of "Naked Baby". So much joy that Bethany felt a creeping warmness coating her feet and lower legs. Not just her feet and lower legs, but the bathroom floor was enjoying the same warmness as well. That's right, Ellie had peed all over my wife and the bathroom floor to boot! If that occurred in the tub, then that's one thing. Still kind of gross, but not a big deal. 

It was then that the panicked cries of my wife drew me upstairs from the basement. With a baby in the bathtub and her own feet (and the floor) covered in urine, she was stricken helpless by the turn of events. Thus, as the conquering hero I envision myself to be, I stride into the bathroom with my chest puffed out. I kneel to the floor and in one swift motion, remove a single baby wipe from the package. I swipe the wipe back and forth across the floor until all is gone. Then, I clean Bethany's feet with the same swift motion. Finally, I wet down our disinfecting cloth (with water) and let it fly back and forth across the floor, killing 99.9% of all germs in its midst.

At this point, I stand up proudly in my best Captain America heroic pose. I look down at my wife flashing a winning smile and make a heroic declaration before exiting the room. "Bethany, my work is done here. By the way, this is going in today's blog. Hope you don't mind." #DaddyWrite

Hey, don't judge me. If Bethany gets to be Supergirl, then I can surely be Captain America.