Day 1,686 - The One Where The Principal Called Home

February has been a busy month. A very busy month. We’ve had three birthdays, a Super Bowl, a Super Bowl parade, a family-wide case of food poisoning, other random illnesses, ridiculously cold temperatures, incredibly warm temperatures (for February), and a nice little eye infection for yours truly. See, big month.

Obviously, with all that has been going on, there’s certainly a few things here and there that I’ve missed. However, instead of rehashing all of that past stuff, I’d rather talk about today and me receiving a phone call from Ellie’s principal.

For the record, it’s generally not a good thing to get a phone call from your child’s principal. It either means that your kid has been royally misbehaving or perhaps they’ve been injured in some kind of dramatic playground accident. On this occasion though, it was none of the above.

Now, something that you need to know about me is that I don’t normally answer phone calls from numbers I don’t recognize if I’m out and about. If I’m home, then I will almost always answer those calls in an attempt to mess with the person on the other end wanting to buy my home or help me refinance my nonexistent loans. My favorite had to be the time I kept someone on the line for 20 minutes while they had a rooster crowing in the background. Today though was one of those times when I was out and about doing some grocery shopping with Ethan. Don’t ask me why I answered the phone but the moral of the story is that I did.

Imagine my surprise when the voice on the other end said, “Hi Mr. Holt. This is Mrs. Williams, the principal of Fox Hill and I have Eleanor here with me on speaker phone.” At this point, it’s pretty safe to say that the only thing running through my mind was something along the lines of “What in the world is going on?”.

Then, Mrs. Williams proceeded to proudly declare that Ellie had been nominated for a Positive Office Referral by her teacher, Mrs. Albaugh. She was singled out due to her love for learning specifically as well as for having a sweet and fun attitude. Ellie also received commendations for showing positive behaviors such as hard work, a positive attitude, and being responsible. In Mrs. Williams exact words, she wished that I could have seen Ellie beaming proudly as she sat there in her office listening to our whole conversation on speaker phone.

Honestly, even though I had to hear these words in the aisles of Hy-Vee rather than in person, I couldn’t have been more proud of Ellie. For one thing, it’s pretty cool to see that her teachers are seeing the same great traits in her that Bethany and I see in her. For another, Ellie thrives on positive affirmation so I know this is going to really encourage her and stick with her for a long time. Not too bad for the first phone call home from the principal, right?

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Day 1,670 - The Lunch

I try to stay on top of things as a stay-at-home dad. Believe me, I really do. However, I have a slight problem that makes it hard for me to do just that. Mainly, I’m unobservant, forgetful, and have a propensity for procrastination. Obviously all of those things work against me on a regular basis. However, there are those occasional days where I set out to do everything right and still find myself failing. Today just so happened to be one of those days.

With Tuesdays being one of Ethan’s school days, that means that our entire morning tends to move really fast. As a result, anything that I can do to make my mornings easier on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I do it. That’s how I found myself making Ellie’s lunch and Ethan’s school snack for the day before the sun had even completely risen.

The idea made plenty of sense in my head. Since I was already in the kitchen and had just finished heating up the kids’ oatmeal, why not go ahead and get stuff done. So with that, I proceeded to make Ellie a delicious ham sandwich accompanied by a side of carrots and red peppers, a cheese stick, and an apple for dessert. Then, I went ahead and slathered some peanut butter between a couple of graham crackers and put them in a Rubbermaid container for Ethan to take to school. Honestly, I was feeling pretty proud of myself. After all, by my own admission, I am unobservant, forgetful, and have a propensity for procrastination.

After getting the kids’ respective food items made, it was time to grab a shower, get dressed for the day, and brush my teeth. Just so you know how quickly the day goes by on a Tuesday or a Thursday, it was pretty much time to leave to take Ethan to school as soon as those relatively simple tasks were done. With that, I instructed Ethan to grab his snack and the three of us headed to Ethan’s preschool to drop him off.

After that, Ellie and I decided to take advantage of our hour together and go complete a task. Namely, we took the car to a drive-thru car wash and got it thoroughly washed. Then, taking advantage of the free vacuums, we went ahead and cleaned the inside as well. I love doing little projects like this with Ellie on mornings when it’s too cold to play tennis. For one thing, she’s actually a ton of help. For another, it’s just fun to hang out with her and accomplish something together. After we finished cleaning, we headed home where we played a couple of rounds of Go Fish before school.

After saying goodbye to Ellie, I headed to church for a meeting this morning and then found my way back home with a little under an hour remaining before it was time to pick up Ethan from K-Prep. See, I told you that the mornings go fast. Once 11:20 am rolled around, I loaded up in the Traverse and went to go pick up Ethan. Generally I get there a little early so that he’s not the last one to be picked up. As I was sitting there in the parking lot, imagine my surprise when I received a text from Ellie’s teacher that Ellie had forgotten her lunch at home followed by a request that I bring it to school.

This honestly caught me completely off-guard. I try to empower my kids fairly regularly by encouraging them to be responsible for getting their lunches in their backpack and making sure their water bottles are full each day. That being said, I realize that my kids are young so I always make sure to ask them to confirm that everything is done. Today was no exception. I couldn’t be mad at Ellie for a simple mistake though. After all, I’ve forgotten much more than a lunch box over the years.

You may wonder how the story ends. It’s nothing too exciting though. Ethan and I drove home and I ran inside and grabbed the lunch box in the kitchen. Then, we immediately drove to Fox Hill, signed in at the office, and walked down to the cafeteria where the two of us found Ellie. Then, we sat there with her for the next 15 minutes while she finished her lunch before we headed home to eat our own lunch. See, pretty simple stuff, right?

I wish I could say this will be the last time Ellie forgets something. However, it’s pretty obvious that she will again. The good thing is that I will inevitably be provided with another opportunity to be Ellie’s hero at some point. It will probably even happen before the year is over too!

#DaddyWrite

Day 1,662 - Snow Days, Distance Learning, and the Doldrums of Missing Dad

Snow days have certainly been a way of life lately in the Holt household. While snow days can be special at first, there are plenty of downsides to them. Those downsides can occur both while the snow days take place and once the kids go back to school.

Last week marked our first snow days of the new semester. The great thing about Ellie’s school district is that the first three snow days of the year are free and clear. In other words, she has no work to do and no responsibilities. That means that there was plenty of fun for us to have. Between watching movies, drinking hot cocoa, and playing in the snow, Ellie, Ethan, and I all had a ball for those first few days. I will say that I was plenty sore and exhausted after all of those trips down our sled hill though. However, all good things must come to an end and that end came on Tuesday once Ellie officially ran out of snow days.

Now, when I say Ellie was officially out of snow days, I mean that she was out of those free and easy snow days. That means that instead of pure fun, it was time for us to do distance learning. Now, I know that some may be wondering what distance learning looks like for a second grader. If I’m being honest, it feels a lot like busy work.

Starting at 9:00 am, Ellie logged onto her school iPad for one of three brief lessons from her teacher. After each call, she was given an assignment to complete. Altogether, she had assignments in reading, writing, and math by the end of the day. She also had an assignment from her PE teacher. I actually did that one with her and I have to say that I was plenty tired by the end. Still fun though. The one good thing about distance learning is that she was completely done by noon each day meaning that we had the afternoon available for fun!

For Ethan, distance learning is not a thing that preschools engage in. Instead, to keep him busy while Ellie had school, I dug out some preschool/kindergarten workbooks that we had around the house and set Ethan to work tracing and writing his letters. I will say that I underestimated how much he would enjoy the workbook. I honestly expected him to only complete a couple of pages but instead he did every page of the workbook. What a trooper, right?

Now, I mentioned how there are downsides once the kids go back to school, right? For the record, I’m not just talking about myself and how I have to deal with the quietness of an empty house (although that is a rather big change to adjust to). During the couple of snow days Ethan has had lately, he had adjusted to being around me all of the time. Therefore, it was apparently quite a shock to his system to go back to school today. So much so that he found himself crying over missing me during the day at school.

Honestly, this happens to Ethan now and then at school. I think a big part of it is that he only goes to school two morning a week. However, that doesn’t make it any easier to digest. It’s pretty hard to hear that your kid was crying at school due to missing you. The lone positive is that Ethan has some great teachers that are pretty talented at helping him work through those emotions while also finding a good activity to distract him with. By the time I picked him up from school at 11:30, he was none the worse for wear.

I certainly wish I could say that distance learning and Ethan missing me are in the rearview mirror. However, I doubt that’s the case. In fact, there’s still plenty of bad weather to come meaning that there will be plenty of snow days to go along with it. However, one good thing about snow days is that I can guarantee there will be plenty of fun playing in the snow, lots of hot cocoa to drink, and snuggles under a blanket while watching a movie. You honestly can’t beat any of that!

#DaddyWrite

Ethan says not to forget about all of the snow to eat.

Day 1,655 - One Last First Day of School Breakfast

Traditions are always fun.

Over the past seven years, I’ve created a few of them. Some with Ellie. Some with Ethan. The thing about traditions though is that you inevitably will experience the tradition for the final time. Heavy stuff, right?

One of my favorite traditions with Ethan dates back to Ellie’s first year in preschool. As you can probably guess, when the big day came to drop her off, I was understandably sad. Couple that with the fact that I didn’t even get to walk her to class (Thanks, COVID) and it was understandably an emotional time. Ethan was still young enough to not really understand that I was sad but I still wanted something to distract us from the occasion. Therefore, on that day, we had our first ever start-of-school breakfast at Chick-Fil-A. While the order will change from time-to-time, there is one constant: we must finish our meal with a milkshake. Yes, you read that right; a milkshake at 9:30 in the morning. Yep, I’m a good parent.

Over the past few years, Ethan and I have marked Ellie’s first day of school in both August and January with a trip to Chick-Fil-A for breakfast. It’s quickly become a fun part of an otherwise sad day for the two of us. However, on this occasion, I realized that this semester’s trip would actually mark our final start-of-school breakfast at Chick-Fil-A. You see, with Ethan starting school in August, there will be no one to go to Chick-Fil-A with and a guy in his thirties going to CFA by himself on the first day of school just seems a little sad.

Honestly, our trip to CFA was nothing super special or out of the ordinary. It was relatively simple. We walked in, placed our order for chicken minis and hashbrowns, and headed to our table that Ethan had picked. For the record, when Ethan goes to Chick-Fil-A, he pretty much chooses the exact same table every time. It’s a high-top table in the glassy sun-room area that used to be the playplace. In fact, that sentence really kind of dates this tradition. When we first began going, the hope was that Chick-Fil-A would eventually reopen the playplace once COVID ended. So much for that, LOL.

Over our breakfast, I mostly just sat and listened as Ethan told me stories from the Christmas break, what he liked and didn’t like, and as he wondered what Ellie was doing. Once we finished our breakfast though, Ethan knew what time it was and he was ready. With that, we made our way back to the counter where we ordered a Cookies and Cream shake to share for the final part of our little routine. Once it arrived, we took turns digging in with a spoon, making sure that after every two bites we passed it back to the other.

Now, I realize that this was a pretty simple story. Not much exciting happened. However, that’s the reality of the day-to-day life of a stay-at-home parent. That doesn’t mean that certain things aren’t worth remembering though. After all, Ethan’s and my little tradition of first day of school breakfasts at Chick-Fil-A are certainly worth remembering to me.

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Day 1,652 - The Jesse Tree

Wow, it’s kind of hard to believe but Christmas break is nearly over. Seriously! Thursday marks Ellie’s first day back at school. Ethan has a little bit longer but his time is coming soon (Muhahaha). If I had to pick one word to describe the past couple of weeks, it would probably be exhausting but that’s ok. Part of what made it exhausting was the same thing that made it fun and that was Bethany being off work for 11 days straight!  Ellie and Ethan just have slightly different personalities when their mom is home. There’s an unbridled excitement that “can’t stop, won’t stop.”

Of course, in between epic play sessions designed to delight kids and exhaust parents, there’s been lots of Christmastime excitement. We’ve had multiple Christmas celebrations, baking days, expeditions to see Christmas lights, and Christmas movies aplenty. All have certainly been memorable. Honestly though, one of the things I’ve come to enjoy the most about our Christmas season is also one of our newer traditions, the Jesse Tree.

For those that are unaware, the Jesse Tree is not referring to me, although that would be pretty cool. Instead it’s referring to Jesse, the father of King David in the Bible, and specifically Isaiah 11:1 (“A shoot shall come out from the stump of Jesse, and a branch shall grow out of his roots.”). Our version of the Jesse Tree is actually a 12x12 coffee table book that features a pop-up tree when we open it. Beginning on December 1, there is a box that we open each day containing a small ornament to hang on the tree. Of course, the ornament would mean nothing without the daily story which serves to describe the ornament and its relevance to the story of Jesus.

It's fairly normal for our family to read the Bible together each night before the kids go to bed. In fact, one of Bethany’s goals for last year was that the kids would get to hear the entire New Testament and we succeeded in that goal. It’s honestly a pretty cool accomplishment even if the kids were more than a little confused during Revelation (To tell the truth, we all are!). With the Jesse Tree though, we do that activity in the morning in addition to our nightly bible reading.

Generally, our time with the Jesse Tree would take place in those last ten minutes before Bethany leaves for work. We would place the book in the middle of the living room floor and all sit around it. For the record, it’s never unusual for Bethany and I to each have a kid in our lap during this time. We would start by reading whatever the story was for the day and talking about it a little with the kids. Then, we would have Ellie and Ethan take turns guessing what the ornament might be on this day. That’s pretty much just as competitive of an experience as you might guess it would be for them. Finally, the time comes for one of the kids to open the little door on the book and pull out the corresponding ornament where they proudly hang it on the little tree. It all culminates on December 25^th with the final story and the final door which contains a star for the top of the little tree.

While 2022 was our first year for this tradition, it’s honestly become a really fun one. For one thing, it’s fun to see the kids excited about being in the Word so early in the morning. It’s fairly normal for them to even still be in their pajamas from the night before (Me too if anyone’s keeping track). I also love watching and being a part of moments that include the kids silently snuggling with us and listening intently. Those are special moments that are all too fleeting as the kids get older and ones that I don’t want to take for granted.

Who knows how many years we’ll get to do the Jesse Tree together as a family. I don’t know if at some point the kids will decide they’re “too old” or “too cool” for this tradition. All we can do is enjoy these little traditions for as long as they last and then enjoy whatever new tradition may follow.

#DaddyWrite

I don't have any Jesse Tree specific photos from this year so enjoy this shot of the kids in their pajamas at a lighted Christmas display.

Day 1,649 - The One with a Ferris Wheel in a Sporting Goods Store

I love creating memories with my kids. It’s honestly something that I’ve tried my best to prioritize. I know that part of being a stay-at-home dad is that neither Ellie or Ethan will necessarily remember everything about their formative years. However, I really hope that they at least remember a few things here and there. For Ethan, I think that we might have made one of those memories on Monday morning.

Last summer, I was subjected to a less-than-enjoyable dental surgery. The reason was that my root canal from two decades ago apparently wasn’t fully completed and what had been left had been rotting in my gums for all that time. Fortunately, a random chipped tooth allowed them to discover what had happened before things could get really bad. Apparently, if it was left unchecked for long enough, I could have eventually gone septic. Crazy, right? Anyway, as part of my surgery, I was told to make a follow-up exam after six months so they could check that everything healed properly. As a result, that’s exactly what I did.

Now, the thing that you need to know about my surgeon is that his office is located in Overland Park which is none too close to home. Therefore, I knew that I needed to make an appointment on a day when Ethan didn’t have school since there was no way I would be able to make it back to the Northland to pick him. Monday just happened to be that day so after we dropped Ellie off at school, we made our way down to Overland Park for my appointment.

Ethan may have gotten a little tired on our trek to Overland Park.

The thing about a six-month follow-up appointment is that it doesn’t take very long to complete. Ethan didn’t even have time to start watching a movie on my phone or anything. A couple of x-rays and a technician drumming on my teeth and we were on our way. Now, I have to be honest. The idea of immediately driving back home did not appeal to me. On past trips, we’ve grabbed lunch at Joe’s KC BBQ. However, I really didn’t feel like eating out on this occasion. As a result, I came up with another fun thing to do: we could head to Scheel’s Sporting Goods and ride the indoor Ferris Wheel!

Now, the prospect of going in a store did not delight Ethan very much. However, his demeanor changed when I wandered up to a register and purchased two tokens to ride the Ferris Wheel. Then, he started getting very excited. By the time we were standing in line for the ride, he was literally jumping up and down in excitement. It probably added to his excitement level that he had never ridden a Ferris Wheel before.

After much anticipation, the time arrived for us to climb aboard. Our ride operator, “Cookie McJingle” strapped us in and pressed the button to start the ride. For the record, I really don’t think our operator was telling me the truth about his name. It seemed inappropriate for me to ask to see a form of identification though. As the Ferris Wheel climbed higher and higher, Ethan’s eyes got bigger and bigger. Before long, we were at the highest point of the store and could see everything in sight. We circled up and down six times before Cookie finally pressed the button and ended our ride.

Once the ride was over, Ethan looked at me with the biggest puppy dog eyes and asked if we could get a treat to share. If you know my kids, then you know that they don’t care about toys at all. The most direct route to their heart is to buy them a treat. Therefore, it was fairly academic that I was going to buy him a treat. So with that, we headed into the café and purchase one of the largest cookies that I had ever seen. After breaking it in half, we sat down and enjoyed our tasty treat together, making conversation all the while. Once our treat was done, Ethan declared that he was ready to go home. Therefore, that’s exactly what we did.

While going to a sporting goods store might now seem like a very exciting thing, the fact is that my kids thrive on one-on-one time. They absolutely love to know that there’s no competition for affection at that point. Honestly, I love those moments too. While I love both of my kids equally, there’s something special about those little moments where it’s just me with one of them. While I know I’ll certainly remember those one-on-one times, I never know whether the kids will or not. That being said, I choose to believe that a first ride on a Ferris Wheel is a big enough moment for Ethan to make a memory.

#DaddyWrite

Day 1,640 - Big Feelings and Little People

Do you ever notice your personality or attitude shifting with the changes in seasons? Some folks definitely find themselves suffering from seasonal depressions as the weather turns. Maybe it’s brought on by the holidays or a lack of fresh air and limited physical activity. Regardless of the cause, it’s certainly a real thing.

In House Holt, we’re definitely seeing a shift in attitudes happening right now, especially with Ethan. I’m not so certain that it’s due to any kind of seasonal depression for them though. Instead, I think it’s primarily due to the fact that they are little people who happen to have big emotions. Unfortunately, sometimes when that is the case, those little people have not yet learned how to fully control said emotions.

For Ethan, that really raised itself last week at K-Prep. Between Thanksgiving break and Bethany being off work, things were certainly not the way that they normally are. While we didn’t notice any issues at home, there definitely were issues at school. Each day, Ethan’s teacher sends home a brief note that basically lets the parent know what their child was like on that day. Normally Ethan is “graded” as being happy and having a good attitude. However, during this instance, Ethan’s report said that he was sad and kind of mopey. In addition, it also stated that he cried because he missed his dad. How heartbreaking is that? The little man had become so accustomed to being around when school wasn’t in session that he cried at being separated. Never fear though as it seems like Ethan’s tears didn’t last long once he got properly distracted.

However, that wasn’t the last time Ethan would shed tears over missing someone or something. That very scenario unfolded today at Quiet Time. For most kids, quiet time is just a time to play alone. I’m pretty open with my kids that Quiet Time is as much for me as it is for them. For Ethan though, Quiet Time is generally an excuse for him to snuggle in his bed and take a nap. In fact, today, he was very open that was his plan. Therefore, imagine my surprise when I heard my son sobbing away upstairs. I listened for a few minutes before deciding that I should intervene.

When I opened the door to his room and went in, Ethan was curled up in his bed, sobbing uncontrollably. When I first asked him what was wrong, I guess he was embarrassed because he replied, “Nothing.” When I pressed again, he told the truth; he couldn’t find his stuffed cat, “Cat,” and was totally inconsolable at the loss. When I offered to help him find “Cat,” his feelings changed pretty quickly. While sometimes finding “Cat” is a massive operation, in this instance it was relatively simple. It was still in Ellie’s bed where the two kids had snuggled this morning before getting up. Once he had Cat safe in his arms, Ethan was cool as a cucumber and ready for that nap.

While it can definitely be stressful to help my kids learn how to deal with some of these big emotions, I also acknowledge that it’s a good thing. For one thing, they’re becoming more well-rounded human beings with an understanding of their feeling and how to deal with them. For another, it stretches me as a parent by forcing me to be more empathetic and sympathetic to their plights. Not my strong suit but I’m trying to keep learning! After all, the day I stop learning, that’s the day that I probably don’t have kids in the house anymore. No one wants that!

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