Day 214 - Systematic Solving of Problematic Couch-Based Scenarios

One of my favorite things about being married to Bethany is how we have similar, but ultimately different personalities. I feel like she really does (for some reason) appreciate my sardonic and irrelevant sense of humor. She even takes part in it from time-to-time. I guess I really have corrupted her in some fashion. 

There are differences though. For example, I'm more of a words guy while Bethany tends to gravitate towards numbers. It's not that I don't understand numbers though; it's just that I don't really care for them. Another area in which we differ is in our ability to problem solve. I feel like my wife certainly has more natural ability to problem solve. Fortunately for Ellie, that's something she has inherited from Bethany.

Since Ellie first started crawling, she's continually wanted to raise the bar for herself. First it was crawling (obviously). Then, she decided it was time to climb up the stairs (and tumble down accordingly). Soon enough, she mastered going down the stairs correctly. Now, she's trying to figure out the whole standing and walking thing. In the meantime though, she decided to learn to crawl on and off of our couches at will. The couch in our basement provides no challenge for little Ellie as it's a short enough height that she can easily get on and off it whenever she wants. The real challenge for Ellie lies with our upstairs couch.

We want to raise the bar, not raise the roof...

Please don't be too disappointed, but I'm not going to grab a tape measurer and give you the exact height discrepancy between the two couches. You'll just have to take my word for it that Ellie struggles with pulling herself up onto our upstairs couch. Another factor is that said couch is notoriously slick due to the leather(?) finish. I know this because I've seen Ellie desperately cling to our t-shirts in an attempt to pull herself up onto the sofa beside us on more than one occasion. Seriously, the girl's got some mad pull up skills. That being said, there has always been an issue when she wants to get on the couch and neither of us are on it. That may no longer be the case though as I witnessed tonight.

It was no shocker this evening when Ellie crawled over to the couch and pulled herself up to a stand. Also not a surprise to see her try in vain to pull herself up onto the couch. The bigger surprise was watching the little wheels turn in her head after her failure. 

Instead of giving up, she inched her way down to the head of the couch and the two throw pillows residing there. Reaching up, she simultaneously dragged both pillows off of the couch and onto the floor before nonchalantly tossing one aside. Then, ensuring that the remaining pillow was in an acceptable position, Ellie pulled herself to stand, placed one foot onto the pillow, and proceeded to push herself onto the couch. She proudly smiled at me as she sat down on the cushion, leaning against the rear of the couch, and proceeded to happily clap for her accomplishment.

I'm certainly happy to see Ellie problem solving at such a young age. Just knowing that she already has the ability to get herself in and out of any pickles that may arise makes me feel good about her chances in this world. 

That being said, I feel like I need to apologize in advance for my daughter's weird sense of humor because it definitely came from me. If she happens to slap you in the face and laughs hysterically, please don't be offended. It's probably somehow my fault. #DaddyWrite

Day 212 - Babbling Babies and the Trek for Tacos

One of the feelings that I remember most leading up to Ellie's birth is nervousness. Now, obviously I was nervous for the 18 years of child-rearing that I knew lay ahead. That's not really the nervousness I'm talking about though. No, instead I was much more nervous for how I thought my life would have to change. You see, I'm a relatively independent person. I've always enjoyed going on little mini adventures, chasing weird obsessions, and basically doing what I want (within reason of course). 

So, when Ellie was born and I began staying at home with her, I was 100% convinced that I was going to have to grow up and mature. Basically, I believed it was called a stay-at-home dad for a reason. Shows how much or how little I know. If I'm being truthful, all that has changed is that I now have my own little sidekick to go on all of these random adventures with. Now, whether she enjoys it or not is up to your interpretation.

Today was really a day absolutely chock-full of little adventures for Ellie and me. It started off with us playing taxi for my sister-in-law, Nicole. You see, Nicole was heading to Higginsville to catch a ride to a wedding near Lake Michigan. If you were wondering (or are bad at geography like me), Lake Michigan is indeed near the state of Michigan. Nicole and I have actually been friends for a long time so it's always fun to spend a little time hanging out and catching up. However, I didn't actually realize just how much Ellie would want to be involved in the conversation.

You see, it's become normal for me to talk to Ellie whenever the two of us are on a car ride. I figure it's good for her development to hear semi-complete sentences and also to just have her daddy be interested in her existence. I mean, it's not like she's an inanimate object or anything like that. So, as a result, Ellie now expects to be engaged in riveting conversation anytime she's in the car. Basically the entire trip, Ellie babbled more than a brook (#DadJoke). However, the best part of her babbling is that she's getting super close to saying "Dada". In fact, she has been making a "Dada" sound. However, I think it's questionable that she even knows what she's saying because, well, because she's a baby.

Ellie's future response to #DadJokes

Now, I realize that my hook for this blog post dealt with my minor obsessions and forcing my sweet daughter to accompany me on all sorts of bunny tracks. Today, the ultimate bunny track appeared for the taking. You see, for quite some time, I've had an affinity for Taco John's. Many a Tuesday night in college was spent leaving campus to fill my stomach with some sweet taco goodness. Now, I find myself without a Taco John's nearby to satisfy my cravings leading the chain to ascend to near-legendary status in my mind.

Keeping all of that in mind, you can imagine my shock and surprise when I saw a billboard advertising Taco John's in Odessa. As soon as I saw those nine letters, nothing was going to keep me from stopping. So with baby in tow, we headed into Odessa, found the restaurant, picked up the order via drive-thru, and headed towards town to find a nice place to park. Once I did so, I happily partook of my meal while Ellie sat in the back seat confused by her father's apparent excitement.

Clearly, Ellie finds this just as riveting as I.

Once I finished my meal, I decided rather than backtracking to the interstate the way I had come, I would just find my own way. Unfortunately I didn't realize just how much of an undertaking that would be. For starters, Ellie's navigational skills leave much to be desired. Not only did she not know true north, she also failed to read any of the road signs when we passed them. We eventually ended up not on the interstate, but beside it. In fact, we drove alongside the interstate for nearly twenty miles before find a place to hop back on. Unfortunately for us, Ellie's navigational shortcomings had led us right into a traffic jam created by road construction. It was there that we came to a complete stop and Ellie's rousing conversation changed from mere small talk to something more akin to "Are we there yet?". 

By the time we finally exited the traffic jam and resumed normal speed, Ellie had been fussing in her boredom for quite some time. Luckily for me, the answer for all that ailed sweet Ellie was a little speed. In fact, she even resumed the cute babbling that I've come to love and adore as opposed to the loud fussiness I've come to disdain.

I guess though I need to learn the lesson of listening to Ellie in both good and bad situations early. It shouldn't be too bad doing so as long as she remembers to put up with my weird obsessions in return. Because as everyone knows, "There's a whole lot of Mexican going on, going on at Taco John's." #DaddyWrite

We've all discussed it; it's time for a Taco John's Intervention...

Day 211 - The Tooth Hurts

Sometimes I love just how differently Bethany and I can view Ellie.

You need evidence? I'll give you evidence. Case in point.

Bethany: I love Eleanor.

Jesse: Why do you love Eleanor?

Bethany: She's just so happy and smiley all of the time.

Jesse: Do you have any evidence to support your claim? I kind of disagree with your statement.

I'm not saying that I don't love my daughter because we all know that's not true. Instead, I'm just saying that Ellie can be and is kind of a handful. At least she is for me. The moment that Bethany walks in that door, Ellie immediately changes into the perfect child. In fact, that has never been more prevalent than this week.

If I come across as slightly on edge, I'm sorry. It's just that Ellie's teething right now. I know that this is something that most kids that are Ellie's age have already gone through. However, we're still waiting on that first tooth to completely arrive. There's been a multitude of false alarms but I think it's finally happening. If I needed confirmation, the tiny patch of white on her bottom gum should be sufficient to confirm it.  

It's funny. Until this tooth began to poke through on Ellie's gum, I never realized just how sharp a baby  tooth could be. I seriously think that Sammy, my cat I had when growing up, has teeth that are less sharp than what Ellie is sporting right now. Now, of course, if my only complaint about Ellie teething were the bite marks all over my nose, ears, fingers, and anything else she can chew on, I'd be doing well. Unfortunately, the biggest issue I have with Ellie's teething is more due to her attitude.

Obviously, I don't have a ton of experience with children that are teething so I'm not sure what's normal and what's not. All I know is that my daughter is not a pleasant human being to be around right now. Her days between the hours of 7 am and 5 pm are basically dominated by epic screaming fits, refusals to get ample sleep, and today, a refusal to even eat. 

Now, I'm willing to be patient with Ellie. In fact, I'd love to just sit and hold her and let her know it's all going to be ok. Unfortunately for me, Ellie's busy nature keeps me from doing just that. The moment I try to hold her, Ellie begins to wriggle, cry, scratch, claw, and scream until she finally gets loose of my grasp. Keeping that in mind, I've had to find ways to distract Ellie during the day. Luckily, Ellie made sure to tell me what she wanted in her own particular way. 

With the high temperatures this week, Ellie and I have basically kept to the basement of our house. Not only is it the coolest room in the house but it has plenty to keep both of us occupied. For example, I can watch television while Ellie happily gazes out the floor-ceiling windows. Normally, she's perfectly content just doing that for hours on end. That was not to be the case today though. From the time Ellie started looking out the window, she stood and beat on the glass while screaming with great intensity. I tried to pull her away and distract her several times, but it just ended up being in vain.

Finally, I decided to just try taking Ellie outside to her new swing on our covered deck. As I strapped her in and began pushing, I was shocked to see the sudden change in Ellie's demeanor. She was smiling and even laughing as I pushed her higher and higher. It was unfortunate that we couldn't really stay outside for longer due to the warm temperatures. However, Ellie did get to go outside later on in the day to hang out in her swimming pool for about 40 minutes. She probably could have stayed even longer, but I just got tired of chasing balls down our driveway just to return them to the pool so we could start that process all over again. 

I'm hopeful that Ellie's easy-going personality will return soon. However, until it does I guess I'm destined to undergo mental and emotional anguish at the hands of my one-year old while counting down the days until the weekend. Whoever would have thunk it? A stay-at-home dad actively counting down the days until Saturday. That's probably normal though, right? #DaddyWrite

Day 210 - My Daughter, The Cow

Ok, maybe this isn't the best title for a blog. In fact, the more I think about it, it's pretty heinous. If I've learned anything in life, it's that you never call a woman of any age a cow. However, I've already typed it out and I don't really want to hit the backspace key. I mean, that's some unnecessary key pressing that doesn't particularly need to occur. Especially when you consider Ellie's lack of reading ability. By the time she's actually able to read this and comprehend it, maybe she'll also be old enough to comprehend her father's weird sense of humor. 

I should probably provide a tiny bit of background as to why I'm referring to nice, little Ellie as a cow. It's not because she's big because we all know that's not the case. That being said, there are certainly times that she eats like a cow. The girl certainly loves her food and her milk. Instead, I can thank Chick-Fil-A for me calling Ellie a cow. You see, today was Cow Appreciation Day and Chick-Fil-A celebrates in a very unique fashion. If you come into the restaurant dressed like a Holstein cow (like the ones in their advertisements), you receive a free meal for having done so. 

So, when you take all of that into account, it's a given I was going to take advantage of free chicken for Ellie. Now, keep in mind, that people normally don't have Holstein cow attire easily on hand. Luckily, we did have some clothes that would work. Between a pair of cow-print pants from our most recent batch of hand-me-downs and an unbuttoned three-to-six month onesie with a  homemade cow's head on the front, Ellie was looking pretty cute if I don't say so myself. So with that, I loaded my daughter up and headed to Chick-Fil-A.

Who's a good moo cow? Who's a good moo cow? Ellie's a good moo cow!

Something that I have noticed is that Chick-Fil-A has to be the unofficial eating establishment of stay-at-home moms all over the KC Metro area. Keeping that in mind, I decided to beat the rush by showing up around 10:30 to take advantage of the free meal. As we reached the restaurant, imagine my surprise when the place was already looking pretty full. After placing our order, I happily found a table alongside the window, but could not procure a high chair for Ellie. It was for the best though as I had forgotten both Ellie's bib and cup so it was slightly easier for me to feed her myself. Once our meals arrived, I slowly fed Ellie a healthy portion of nuggets and her fruit cup (keeping the apples for myself of course since she can't chew them) while trying to grab occasional bites of my sandwich for myself.

I say slowly because there was certainly plenty to distract Ellie on a day such as today. First and foremost would be the iconic Chick-Fil-A cow who was wandering around the premises greeting visitors. In fact, every time he walked by our table, "Eat Mor Chikin" sign hanging around his neck, Ellie immediately stopped whatever she was doing to stare at her new bovine friend. Couple that with about 15 kids wearing white trash bags with spots drawn in Sharpie and that one elderly couple with pictures of cows taped to their foreheads and you can tell that Ellie was easily doing more watching than eating.

Honestly, I love days like this. I think it's fun to go on weird little outings like this with Ellie. I know she'll never remember them but I should remember at least a few of them. I just found myself with one lone regret from the day; I didn't manage to get a photo op of Ellie and the cow enjoying chicken together. Does my failure to get a photo of a stranger in a cow costume holding my baby girl mean I'm failing as a parent? Probably does. #DaddyWrite

Ok, I lied. Look closely and you can see Ellie staring out the window happily watching the cow jump.