Day 99 - When Boats and Presidential Aspirations Collide

So I obviously take great joy in telling the world about every negative thing that my daughter's ever done.  That way when she runs for President, the world can pull out all of these great stories from when she was an infant.   I can see it now.

"Excuse me, Miss Holt.  I see here on your father's blog that apparently you had a massive blowout in your diaper as an infant.  I also see that you were a stubborn child who detested naps, you screamed to an excessive degree making a medical student question their career path, and...and you stood on a sidewalk next to a giant, dancing piece of pizza in a rain storm.  With a track record such as this, can you really say you're capable of being our next President?"  

Now obviously, Ellie will not have any kind of answer to that because she would never in her wildest dreams have expected Lester Holt to come up with that kind of question.  Sadly, it was that very question that would cost her all of her Presidential aspirations and propel President LaBeouf to his unprecedented fifth term in office.  By the way, how impressive is it that "Uncle Lester" is still conducting debates at the age of 92?

Just remember who predicted the Shia LaBeouf Presidential bid first...

The point of this little tangent is that #DaddyWrite isn't just about the negative stories.  Sometimes it's about the cute positive stories.  So, here we go.  Ellie has always loved her bathtime.  Basically from the first time we plopped her down in a tub of water, she was in Heaven.  She loves to splash the water all over whoever is responsible for washing her on that given evening, grinning from ear-to-ear every time we pause to wipe water from our brows as it drips down our face (We're not crying.  No, we're not crying).  In fact, her love for bath time has increased since she learned to sit upright while being washed.  

Since she learned to sit upright, I've been on a quest.  A quest for bath toys.  Believe it or not, this was actually a more difficult mission than I anticipated.  It's actually really hard to find age appropriate bath toys.  Basically everything I would look at would read "Age 1 to 3 years".  "Age 1 to 3 years"?  Really?  I want my baby to have bath toys now.  Not later.  Yesterday, the day would finally arrive when my mission would achieve success.  With a trip to Walmart, I stumbled across the final set of tiny boats in the entire store produced for infant use.  With a great feeling of pride swelling through me, I placed the boats in my shopping cart, puffed out my chest, and power-walked my way out of the store.

Tonight was actually the big night that I got to see Ellie play with her boats for the first time.  To see the look on her face as they floated by her in the water.  The pink one, the orange one, the yellow one.  Then to see her act out her lifelong dream (all six months of it) of being Godzilla as she submerged the boats to the white, porcelain depths of the bathtub below.  And just in case any tiny, imaginary sailors survived being submerged, she inserted the boats into her mouth and proceed to drool all over what was left of them.   

When the destruction was completed, we pulled Ellie out of the tub, released the water down the drain, and dried her off in her Zebra towel.  I could swear though that I saw her glance back over her shoulder at the boats as they moored on the bottom of the tub as if to say, "This isn't over..."  #DaddyWrite 

Day 98 - Thanksgiving is Coming...

More often than not, I feel as if I'm just making things up as I go.  The whole blogging thing?  In fact, there are days now and then where I'm sitting down, blankly staring at the cursor blinking on an otherwise blank 'Word' document.  Child rearing is no different in any way, shape or form.  It's like Ellie is the blank 'Word' document and her cry (and/or laugh) is the blinking cursor just waiting on me to do something.  The problem that lies within is that my utter lack of experience will continue to rear its head, even if I feel like I'm doing pretty well.  Please explain?  Ok, will do.

As you know, yesterday was doctor day for Ellie.  Well, in addition to her shots, we also got some specific instructions regarding her food intake.  Namely her doctor feels like it needs to increase.  Ellie's always kind of been a tiny baby in terms of her weight.  In fact, she's made a good habit of falling on and off the scale used to track that stuff on a consistent basis.  She's actually in the 2nd percentile for her weight right now and that's high for her!  Anyway, her doctor outlined a multi-step plan for how he wants us to proceed.

• ·         Step 1 - For every five ounce bottle of milk, we need to add a teaspoon of formula
• ·         Step 2 - Make certain that we are giving her a Vitamin D/Iron/Etc. supplement with each bottle
• ·         Step 3 - Begin to feed Ellie solid food three times a day

Side note, I feel like there may be some kind of issue deep within me that I couldn't type the words 'Step 1' without immediately being overcome by an unquenchable desire to sing The Fray's 'How to Save a Life'.  I wonder where I went wrong...

Back on point, today was the first day for trying Ellie's new diet (or lack thereof).  After doing a little research, we discovered that Ellie's system could supposedly handle five ounces of solid food over the course of a day.  So beginning bright and early this morning, we opened up a fresh container of pears for Ellie and went to town.  Four big spoonfuls later and Ellie was showing disinterest and was clearly ready to be done.  Content with that, I put the remainder in the fridge to save for lunch time.  Once lunch time rolled around, I offered her another three and a half spoonfuls before she began turning up her nose at it.  Like any good parent, I chose to put it away and save it for later.

When dinner time arrived this evening, the pears reappeared on the kitchen table but Ellie's appetite for them was nowhere to be found.  Seriously, it needed to be on a milk carton somewhere.  Not only was she flipping her head from side-to-side to avoid the spoon but she was actually yelling at us for our attempts to feed her.  I know, we're such horrible parents.  

Here is where I reach my conundrum.  How do you go about increasing your child's food consumption without feeling like you're fattening up a turkey for Thanksgiving.  Seriously, talking about my child not weighing enough makes me feel like there's some kind of deadline that we have to meet or we'll be stuck with Tofurkey this year.  No one wants that at all.  

Honestly, I feel like Ellie's weight is right where it needs to be.  She's just always going to have a long and lean body type.  Especially if she's built like her mother and I.  The problem is that we pay her doctor to tell us how to raise her up well.  Which is needed because of the whole lack of experience thing that keeps rearing its head.  As long as she seems happy and healthy, then all should be copacetic.  I think.  #DaddyWrite

Day 97 - "Keep Calm, Your Mom is Calling"

Sequels are sometimes a really good thing.  If we're talking about the really good ones, then it's obvious.  'The Empire Strikes Back', 'The Dark Knight', 'The Bourne Supremacy', 'The Winter Soldier'.  All sequels that are, for my money, better than their predecessor.   The problem with sequels though is that they can be really, really, really bad.  Painfully bad even.  For example, 'Ocean's Twelve'?  I have yet to meet the person who loves that movie, mostly because no one out there has the foggiest of what's occurring.  'The Temple of Doom'?  Without a doubt, the darkest and gloomiest 'Indiana Jones' movie.  Also, possibly the most racist as it did give us the character of Short Round (Okie Dokie, Dr. Jones).  'Speed 2: Cruise Control'?  The sequel so bad it couldn't even draw Keanu Reeves back for a payday.  So what's the point here?  Well, today was Doctor day again for Ellie and in this case, the sequel was not better than its predecessor.

I actually should have been ready for the day to be a little rough as Ellie started the day off in a less than optimal manner.  She was happy and content for Bethany for about the first hour of the day.  However, as soon as she went down for her nap, that was all over.  I can still hear the screams echoing through an otherwise quiet home.  Reverberating from wall-to-wall for an hour plus without ceasing.  In that time frame, I tried everything I could do to calm my child.  Bouncing, swinging, holding, singing, snuggling.  Nothing was work.  I finally took her upstairs to our bedroom and laid her in the bed next to me.  Even that did not work.

Guessing I looked about like poor Pluto here with all of the screaming.

Finally, out of sheer desperation, I decided to bring in the big guns.  That's right; I called Ellie's mommy!  From the moment that Ellie heard Bethany's voice springing forth from my iPhone, she immediately calmed.  Ellie then began wiggling and squirming relentlessly until she finally settled in the fetal position with her head resting on my thigh.  She would then go to sleep almost immediately, even producing baby snores in the process.  Unlucky for us, by the time all of this occurred, Ellie only had about an hour of naptime remaining before we had to leave home to be at the doctor's office.  Once the time came, I gently roused my daughter, moved her into her car seat, and headed on the perilous two mile journey to Priority Care Pediatrics for her six month checkup.

All was fine for us at the doctor's office until the time came to disrobe Ellie so she could be weighed.  Now, she never enjoys this, but generally she can be calmed relatively quickly.  That was not to be on this given Tuesday.  Her respite from screaming had run its course and thus the ear-shattering noises resumed.  While I thought it was bad at the time, I hadn't seen anything yet.  Once Ellie's doctor arrived, things got real.  Ellie's faced turned tomato-red as she belted one scream after another leaving her doctor to state, "Boy, she sure does have an opinion, doesn't she?".  To add to the lunacy, there was a medical student on rounds with Ellie's doctor today.  Her face couldn't hide her true feelings, no matter how hard she tried.  I'm certain she was asking herself, "Do I really want to do this?  Surely it's not too late for me to go back to the family business.  Dad could teach me everything I need to know about the upholstery business, right?".

Once the exam was mercifully done, I began giving Ellie a bottle in the exam room to attempt to soothe her.  Unfortunately, that would be short lived as the nurse returned, four syringes in hand.  One at a time, the syringes would enter Ellie's leg resulting in screams of pain.  Poke and scream.  Poke and scream.  Poke and scream.  Poke and scream.

And with that, I dressed my daughter, placed her in her car seat and headed for home.  I wish I could say that there is no release date for the sequel to this.  Unfortunately that is not true.  Coming March 27th, 2017 to a doctor's office near you:  Ellie vs. the Shots, Part IV.  #DaddyWrite

Day 95 - Baby, You Put the 'Sweet' in Sweet Potatoes

I always enjoy a little bit of adventure in my life.  Love to see new places, experience new things, meet new people, experience the culture.  Part of what goes into all of that for me is the food.  A necessity whenever we are traveling is to try either local cuisine or at the bare minimum, a chain that is only located in the region.  For example, when Bethany and I traveled the Pacific Coast Highway, there was rarely a day that went by that our dinner didn't consist of something that could only be found in the area.  You didn't see us settling for McDonald's or Taco Bell (Although, one cannot truly say that one settles for Taco Bell).  I already see a bit of that adventurous spirit coming out in Ellie as we're starting her on solid foods.  In fact, we've tried her on three different foods thus far and garnered three very different responses.

For example, the very first food that we tried Ellie on was rice cereal.  Clearly an old standby.  Basically what anybody says you should feed a baby first.  I haven't done the long-term scientific study to support that hypothesis, but I'm just going to trust in those that did.  The first couple of nights that we had Ellie on rice cereal, we were guilty of mixing it with too much milk.  As a result, the consistency of it was reminiscent of a cold bowl of porridge (I think).  I mean, it's doubtful that Goldilocks would have enjoyed it and here we were shoving it down Ellie.  Once we corrected our mistake, she became quite the fan of it.

I was bummed to find out that these guys don't live in rice cereal, only 'Rice Krispies'.

After a few days of feeding Ellie rice cereal, we decided it was time to expand her pallet.  Taking into account the foods we had on hand, we decided to move onto peas.  On the first night, we happened to mix the peas into the rice cereal resulting in a super weird confection.  As we put the spoonful in Ellie's mouth, her immediate reaction was to open her mouth and just let her tongue hang there.  It was like she was saying, "What are you doing to me?"  Keeping that in mind, we proceeded to try peas by themselves the next couple of days resulting in worse and worse reactions each time.  On the final day, Ellie actually went into an epic meltdown as if to say, "No, no, no.  I don't want peas again.  Don't you dare do this to me again!"  And thus ended the peas experiment.

I like that my daughter and my former roommate, Joey, have the same reaction to peas.

 

Of course, like any good scientist, we would be remiss if we ended our experiment here.  The next focus: sweet potatoes!  From the first time we spooned a serving out, Ellie was instantly intrigued.  As she took her first bite, her eyes widened and her mouth erupted in a huge smile.  She immediately swallowed, leaned forward in her high chair, and grunted enthusiastically as if to say, "More, more, more."  So of course, we obliged and with each spoonful, Ellie would lunge forward and the spoon would disappear deep into the recesses of her mouth.  As we're just starting Ellie out on food, we definitely don't want to overfeed her.  Unfortunately for us, she loves the sweet potatoes so much that she will actually break down when she's cut off for that meal.  I don't know if it's possible for somewhat to be addicted for sweet potatoes, but Ellie's pretty much there.  It's like crack for babies.

Today marked a sad day in the Holt household though.  The sweet potato supply has dwindled and we are now forced to move onto other edibles.  The options remaining?  Carrots, peaches, and pears.  Time will tell if any of those will fill the void that the sweet potatoes have left in poor Ellie's stomach and her heart.  And her heart.  #DaddyWrite